The Life of a Gull

When the gulls come of age,

they leave the cliffs that hide them.

Their mothers and fathers send them off

on a quest to change them.

They follow a human boat

around the vast seas:

past silver beaches,

and over dancing reefs.

Dark spirits shall taunt them

and storms shall veer them,

but with the strongest hearts,

they shall persevere.

They shall return to the cliffs,

where they were born,

their wings beating still,

and their strength tired and beat.

Their mothers and fathers

shall welcome them with opens arms,

and they shall settle down

to live the life of a gull.

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(Another thank-you for the inspiration, Phoebe!)

Travels to Space on Exotic Creatures

Believe me,

it’s quite possible.

Simply click your tongue three times,

maybe four

and state the magic words:

then wait—

you’ll be on the back of a giant squid,

otherwise known as the Architeuthis

or wizard of the sea.

Mesmerised by its inky dreamy spells,

you’ll travel through the sky

to the edge of the Earth.

And there you will find,

if you look so carefully,

where the humpback whales debate over mysteries of life,

over a toast of planets

and exotic stars.

The Greatest Chandelier

Every morning I wake to the sound

of engineers clanging

and operators raising the crane.

People can’t see them,

for their orange safety vests

are invisible to the world.

Because the sun

is a giant, whirring machine.

It consists of billions of miniature bulbs,

flashing gold-white light

as the greatest chandelier imagined.

The workers, hired for this one purpose,

tirelessly lift the sphere,

the sphere essential to our existence;

its fragile sheen teetering

on the single point,

the black void,

the construction site.

Then when their work is done

they perch on the clouds

and pick at tuna sandwiches.

They watch the world rise,

and they watch the world wander

before they unhook the sun from its height,

and nobody knew they existed.

Anything Can Fly

See yourself flying,

and below you:

boats.

Schooners and Sharpies,

Cutters and Catboats

catching the wind

to sail the unknown skies.

Imagine boats can fly.

Yes,

just like you,

your wings wide and strong.

In fact,

choose anything.

You don’t need boats.

They could be king-sized beds,

their pillows the hot air balloons.

You could land on them;

ride them like magic carpets,

if you’re feeling tired.

So lay down,

rest

and imagine yourself flying.

Salty Water

Pour salt into water:
rinse and spit.
Repeat.

Useful for wisdom teeth, sore gums, tooth decay and enamel rot.

Inexplicable rashes, bruises in the shape of possibly someone you know, grass stains, itchy backs and noses, broken legs (not arms); a craving for chocolate-rolled foudant, courtesy of somebody; nervous toes and hay fever are helped.

But there's more,
so I'll let you in on a little secret.

Destructive arguments, war, the missing TV remote, demonic possessions, terminal illnesses, the mid-life crisis--

death

--and a broken heart,

are all things of the past.